Week 2's Thoughts

I've officially been here for a little over 2 weeks!!!



1. I finally got to experience night life in Dakar and as expected it lived up to all the hype. There appeared to be masses of tourists and visitors and just Senegalese University students that all love going out every night. It's certainly been interesting. There are expatriate bars, and random bars and even more random clubs. At night, people are quite different from the way I usually see them.



2. I realized that a lot of things that I and others had deemed Western really can't just be relegated to the West or to America. ie French fries!!! They eat a lot of them here and not with ketchup but inside burgers and on top of omelettes and with fried fish and a myriad of other things. This doesn't just happen in Senegal. A lot of countries eat French fries!!! I don't know why we were so shocked to see that in Senegal but it's normal. Yes there are tons of signs of Western, specifically American influence in Senegal but just because something is here that's also in the states, it doesn't mean that it was "stolen from America."



3. I've regained the frustration that I tend to have with non-profit organizations. Actually that should be rephrased. It's not the organizations, but rather the situations they find themselves in. I love the people I work with and the organization. I just hate that they just don't have the manpower or the money to fully execute all their projects. It's so sad that whenever money's tight the nonprofits and the arts are always the first to suffer. And we wonder why society is so screwed up? It's because we don't place enough importance on the things that make us human-our ability to feel and to rightfully coexist with each other. The things that could feed our thirst for knowledge and our desire to explore all the realms off our humanity are becoming more and more out of reach.



4. I've remembered the sometimes horrid reality of what it means to be a woman. One of my favorite quotes from a book edited by Eve Ensler goes as follows:



"For as badass as I am - or like to think I am - in the back of my mind, I am always wholly aware of the fact that at any moment I could be raped.”
Periel Aschenbrand “In Memory of Imette” From A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant, and A Prayer



When I read this I completely understood because I knew that I often feel the same way. I've gotten really good at not allowing society to condition me into being afraid of my sexuality but I'd also gotten too comfortable. Yes there is always this awareness of "what could happen," but I rarely allow that to dictate what I wear, or my experiences. Long story short i had a very good night that went bad yesterday because of two horrible cab drivers and the three or four men who tried to follow me home. Let me make this clear,-that kind of happens every day here but it's usually harmless. However, when it's 3am, you're still slightly inebriated, and alone in a foreign country-things change.

By the time I made it back to my room, my hands were shaking and I made 3 international calls. 1 of them proved pointless but the other two were with a dear friend. The third was the result of me feeling the need to lash out at any man I could. I just needed someone to listen to me rant. In retrospect I realize that while I really wanted to needlessly be angry at him, I simultaneously needed him to make me feel safe. When he didn't do that I ended up just more upset. Anyways that is a whole different story but I did finally accept that there are certain people with whom I am completely incompatible.

So....biggest lessons for this week are not to pay the cab driver ANYTHING until he's dropped you off. And when you want comfort-just ask for it, especially if you're alone in a foreign country.